Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

by | May 30, 2017 | Uncategorized | 0 comments

Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

It is so hard for us to realize our own worth- especially when we’re sick.  How often do we, despite having a splitting headache, snot running down our throat, and a bleeding nose from excessive tissue use, get dressed and make the journey to work.  Often, questioning our own decision making?

Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

How often do we bend to other people making demands on our time, sending the message that our wellness is less important than whatever report, client, or meeting.  I saw this in myself recently.  I frequently get into the car, drive to work, sometimes telling myself that my physical and mental health are less important than something that needs to be done at work. Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

The truth is- it’s not.

But, what’s driving us to believe that we aren’t as important? Where is it based?

In my experience, we will find the root is in our very early relationships.  Our relationship with work, as our relationships with other people, mimics our early childhood relationships.  In fact, I may go as far as saying that they are attempts to recreate or resolve issues or obstacles that formed in our early years.

Is that a huge shock?  Of course not, we all know that the struggles we have today are based in our histories.  Let’s take an example- a fairly simple example.  Jane Doe grew up in a middle class home with relatively little economic hardship.  Her parents were very engaged in the community, and Jane was encouraged to be engaged as well.  Jane, as an adult, struggled with seeing how her own wants and needs were more important than those of others.  Eventually Jane realized that every time she reached out for affection from her father, she was subtly put to the side or told that they would spend time, “later”.  It resulted in her own self-doubt, “Am I good enough?” or lack of compassion, “I should be able to do this without any form of gratification.”Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

Now, we can’t change our jobs, our histories, or other people- but we can put up healthy boundaries, even if they are as small as taking a day off.  Even if it is communicating that expectations are too high.

Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

As always, if you want to get to the bottom of loving yourself, search for an awesome professional near you.  If you are in the LA county area- You can always contact me at (562) 273-2124.

Attachment and Taking Care of Ourselves

Recent Posts

Talking to Your Teen About Going to Therapy

Talking to Your Teen About Going to Therapy Being a teenager is a difficult time.  Well, being alive is a continuous adventure of change, overcoming obstacles and celebrating victories, that’s a given.  However, adolescence is the rite of passage between childhood and...

A Brief Introduction to Boundaries

A Brief Introduction to Boundaries It took some brainstorming to pinpoint exactly what it is we do at PAX Therapy and Family Services.  What does therapy with us help achieve?  What gets better?  After a sit down with our therapists, and looking at what our clients...


Gaslighting What is gaslighting?  How do you know if you are being gaslit?  Click on the photo above or this link to check out our youtube video: Gaslighting So what I wanna talk about today is gas lighting. It gets thrown...

The Therapy Relationship

The Therapist Guide When I think about the journey of therapy, I visualize the journey of Dante through the 3 epic poems of Il Inferno, Il Purgatorio, e Il Paraiso.  In order for Dante to experience the fullness of paradise, he experiences the horrors of the rings of...

3 Hacks for the Ambivalent-Avoidant Relationship

Let’s talk about the ambivalent and avoidant attachment connection and its relationship to toxicity and codependency. I want to quickly review how each of these attachments forms. Then I will go into 3 tips for repairing attachment in a relationship that has an...

Therapy for the Anxious Avoidant Attachment

  The basis of the Anxious Avoidant Attachment Relationships and connections are the basis of human existence.  In no era or time have we seen evidence that humans function alone.  We run in packs.  As we have evolved, the way we connect changed.  In addition, we...


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published.